Taking Action

Thursday, 18 June, 2009 08:36 Last Updated on Tuesday, 23 June, 2009 22:16 Written by Cynthia Ezell, LMFT

During my commute to work the other day I found myself fantasizing about writing a letter to the parents of one of my adult patients. They were treating him in a manner that was unconscionable, and in a flash of grandiosity I imagined that receiving a letter from me might soften them up a bit. Of course, it was a crazy idea. Just the realization that I was fantasizing about taking action on behalf of my patient and inserting myself into his family system made me realize how deeply his pain is affecting me.

My fantasy of writing that letter was motivated by my discomfort with the psychic burden of simply sharing his pain and disappointment.

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The Strange Relationship of Theories of Attachment and Differentiation

Monday, 16 March, 2009 20:24 Last Updated on Wednesday, 18 March, 2009 11:07 Written by Jamie Kyne

I was reading today at the office, in between sessions, on Ellyn Bader and Peter Pearson’s website. They’ve got some good material there for therapists and clients alike (check it out). I was reading particularly in Ellyn Bader’s short essay reflecting on her experience participating in a panel presentation called “Attachment and Differentiation in Couples Therapy”. She herself had set up this panel presentation at a recent couples’ therapy conference and she and Stan Tatkin were the panelists. Maybe some of you were there. I wish I had been.

Dr. Bader wrote:

I structured this panel into the conference because I believe it is time for people [in] our field to begin integrating the best of these two theories. Couples therapy is most effective when the therapist knows how to use both attachment and differentiation based interventions and conceptualizations.

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